peaceonearth | He drew stars around my scars

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He drew stars around my scars

Ruby had forgotten that she could hurt like this. It's been decades since she'd been injured this badly. Sam had made a quick bed out of the blankets and pillows that Ruby kept in her SUV for nights stargazing with Sam or she slept in the back rather than get a hotel room on quick hunts. Once that had been done, he'd moved her to stitch her up in the comparatively clean environment of the SUV. That done, he'd insisted they both get some rest, stating that she didn't need to be moved or jostled for a little while in order to give her body a little time to heal. He'd pulled a blanket over the both of them and curled up with her. Just to give you body heat he'd said. Ruby had joked that they could create a little more heat if he wanted, but they both knew from the weakness in her voice that she wasn't feeling up to anything more than talking.

"Talk to me," Ruby finally whispers after a few moments of silence. "I promise I'll try to sleep if you do."

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Sam had been frantic during and after the call Ruby made to him. He fumbled around for his keys and drove as fast as the law would allow. A partial sigh of relief only finally caught up with him when Ruby was stitched up and warmth started to return to her at the very touch of her. He did his best to smile at her joke but it was a pittance of what it could be at the best of times.

At her insistence, he opened his mouth but had nothing to say just yet. Instead his hand raised to the side of her head to caress the loose strands of her hair behind her ear. Eventually, the words form naturally, "I don't know what to tell you. I'm glad you're safe. That nothing took you away from me....

"Are you still feeling cold?" He could sleep once he was certain she wouldn't drift into oblivion.

She regrets that she had to terrify Sam that way, but she hadn't had any choice if she wanted to keep her body alive. At least he tries to smile a little at her joke. It's enough for now.

She is feeling better and the shivering has stopped, though she's still cold and weak. "Puppy, I'm not ever going to let anything take me away from you. If you hadn't come or if you'd been too late, I'd still be here with you; my body just wouldn't be alive. You're going to get rid of me that easy."

She nods at his question. "It's better though. My body just needs time to make more blood and pump it through."

It would never occur to him as something he needs to forgive her for. Honestly, he'll be glad she called him when there is time to reflect back on it. The smile might fade but return as certain intervals to show her he's trying. Calm is only what he is on the exterior. Inside he's using every ounce of bravery instilled in him by the knowledge that anything else helps neither of them.

To pretend he isn't shaken that revelation isn't something as everything else he's handled thus far. His eyes widen. "I couldn't live with myself if I didn't come as fast as I could. ...What do you mean? You could still survive in a body without a heartbeat? Or do you mean you'd have to jump another body?" He's already come out and told her when stitching her up that she has to survive because he sees a future with kids and her. They will have to address it sometime. He feels it'd be best when she recovers if she doesn't rehash it here. "I always need you. Always at the end of the world together."

Another one of his faint smiles shows up. "When we get back, I'll give you some of mine. Just rest for me a little bit first."

She definitely needs him to stay calm so she appreciates that he's able to manage it. If he were panicking, she'd have to exert energy to help calm him or take charge. She's not sure she's got that energy right now.

Oops? "I possessed a dead body for the first fifteen years of my time topside. You've seen the bullet wound scar on my chest? That killed the body I was in a few months after I took up residence. I didn't have a heartbeat or body temperature, but demon power kept the body from decaying, just like it keeps me from aging now. I wouldn't have to jump bodies, but I could if something happened to this one that I couldn't fix like losing limbs." She remembers that because it'd made an impact. There's a few things she wants to sort through first (like can she even have them after all this time). His words make her tear up briefly. She doesn't want to think about the end of the world because while it's certain she'll still be around for it, he won't.

"Are you sure you've got enough to spare?" she asks, not thinking entirely clearly. "I don't want you weak too."

No matter how much he would like to give in to the panic for well-being, he wouldn't fail her like that. He wouldn't be cut out to be a doctor either. Ever since that fateful time a monster was stealing Gus' life force and he helped Ruby with thr case, he knew being a doctor was what he wanted. Ruby was counting on him in the moment.

Good. Sam was glad she was able to talk and encouraged her to continue to story with a hum here or there. Somehow the story felt familiar but he shook that feeling away to focus on how she was telling it, if she was slurring her words or not. Relief took ahold more when it was just her weak voice but prominently steady state. "Promise me you'll do everything in your power to stay alive in this body. I can't bare to think you're walking around dead." Never mind that he could never stomach seeing her steal somebody's body, much less look any other way. They can sort out those things later. He's at the very least sure her innards are back in place similar to someone who's had a c-section. It had been a cringey experience in class, but now he was thankful the professor made his class watch a live cesarean. He can only see that his words were the wrong choice after he's already said them. He ducks his neck closer to her height and first mouths 'I'm sorry' as the rest of his words grow into a low voice. "Focus on me right now. What matters we're together right now. You're doing great."

"I won't miss a little bit." He nods his head to convince her of this, not push her concerns her side. "I'll be on bed rest with you. Order anything we need in. Promise it will be kinda like an early weekend."

She's glad she could give him some practice? In any case, he's handled the whole thing admirably.

Her voice is quiet and tired, but steady. He needn't worry about that. "Promise. I would miss the whole heart beating, blood rushing aspect to being alive too. Besides, everything feels more when I'm alive." Also, she's pretty sure Sam would be a little creeped out by her sleeping if she weren't alive. She knows it took him a bit in life one to get accustomed to. Ruby is grateful for it as well. Everything feels normal in any case; painful, but normal. She shakes her head at his silent apology; he can't help that he won't live as long as her and she wouldn't want to change him in any of the ways that would allow him to live as long as she does. She lets her fingers crawl up his chest to rest against his pulse before she speaks. "I'll also have to be very much alive for the whole baby thing you mentioned earlier." It's as good a topic to focus on the here and now, as well as their future together as any.

"Only if you promise to rest with me," she agrees with his proposal. "I always like our long weekends in bed best anyway."

His pulse hasn't settled from the thought that he almost lost her and still faster than normal. As Ruby's continues to speak in her condition, he's listens for while, all the while finding solace in her cognitive state. It wouldn't be easy on him to adjust if her body died but only because his rationale would be that he could have done something to stop it. He insists she not move around so much by putting his hand on her shoulder and reminding her in simple terms. "Get some rest. We can talk about that later. Discuss when. Choose names. When the time is right." He moves his hand around her head so so could have something of a pillow to support it.

"Sounds like a plan. I'll reorder all of last weeks meals so it'll be like a vacation in bed."

She does get some rest, dozing a little more deeply than usual in the back of the SUV, snuggled up against him. Once it's daylight, they both start stirring again. Ruby manages to convince Sam that she feels well enough to be in a moving vehicle. She dozes in the back while Sam drives like a grandma all the way back to the penthouse. The doorman doesn't even blink when Sam carries her to the elevator, just lets them know the groceries they ordered were delivered not fifteen minutes ago. He'd let the delivery person in and watched as the groceries were put on the counter then made sure everything was locked up.

Once Ruby was settled in bed and Sam had put the groceries up, he'd done a transfusion with his own blood then crawled in bed with Ruby, per her conditions so they both could get some much needed rest.

He does his best not to make her stire when he puts the car into drive. Every turn he takes is slower than his slowest driving. By the time they reach the penthouse, more than double the usual drive time has passed. Sam wipes the sweat off his brow and with one hand on the passenger's headrest, he turns back to glimpse at Ruby before he gets out of the car. Opening the rear door, he brushes her shoulder gently to assess her awakeness gain her attention. "We're here. I'm going to carry you, alright." It might have looked like they're being romantic when he carried her in. His hands weren't as free as he liked so he asked the guard nicely to get someone to bring the groceries up. He thanked the man that came up after putting Ruby in bed.

While he put the groceries away, he grabbed himself a juice vegetable shake. He downs it once he gives Ruby just a little over the safe limit of his blood. The part where they both are in bed with each other is the easiest part. Only then does he finally start to relax. "Give it a little bit then tell me if you feel better. That's all the blood I think I can give." He closes his eyes.

The drive is smooth, restful, and very long, but Ruby appreciates the care. She doesn't argue when he picks her up, gritting her teeth against the pain of the necessary jostling. She dozes again once she's tucked in bed, waking up to watch Sam start the IV. She makes idle chit chat about movies to watch and what they've got to snack on while the transfusion happens.

The blood makes her feel warmer almost immediately, though not physically stronger yet. "it's more than enough," she assures Sam once he slips into bed with her. "I'm warmer. Still weak, tired, and sore, but warmer." It's a good start. "How do you feel?"

He apologizes for his part in the pain when moving her. The elevator makes it more simple to travel to their room without anymore incidents. He's careful to set her comfortably on the bed. The IV doesn't take him long to start. He finds her vein with one attempt and his one with two. He watches her slip in and out of consciousness, more mindful of the context clues for how she's feeling. It does seem to him that she is warming up as the slightly shiver in her being dissipates.

He doesn't except her to have any physical energy any time soon. It'd take the mightest mammel some time to recover even. His the first to suggest juice or fruits to snack on and go retrieve them. He has them with him after disconnecting the IV. "I feel good. About the same as you. A little bit light headed." He holds up a piece a fruit, which is to add that its nothing food can't fix. "Let me know if you feel anything else. I'll have to look at your wound later to make sure it's not infected."

He needn't apologize. The pain was inevitable and temporary.

Good. She doesn't want to disappoint him or overly worry him. The sugar in the fruit will help immediately. She murmurs something about grabbing some protein as well; they've got chicken and other sliced meat in the fridge for snacking. The protein will help their bodies build more blood over the next few hours. She nods in agreement to tell him if she feels anything else. "You did a good job and the whole demon thing will help a lot to keep away infection. It doesn't like not being the strongest thing in my body." The demon she means.

She's made of stronger stuff that he has to give her credit for. This is the first time he's ever seen her hurt so the apologizes continue forth now and then.

It's a complicated thing to describe yet everything around him is humming and deafening at the same time. He finds himself leaning closer to be able to hear her request. At least he takes it as such. "Right. I– I'll get some yogurt too." Meat just seems to heavy of a food to digest quickly. He touches her hair, sweeps it back before he gathers his footing at the edge of the bed. He plasters on an unconvinced smile. "I still think we should watch it carefully. I just am worried about your insides. Will the demon part of you really help you any faster?"

Eventually, once he has more assurances, he goes and comes back to her side with a tray of small portions of food for the two of them. It might seem like he pulled everything from the fridge.

She dismisses all the apologies and assures him she's fine. She knows he's not used to seeing her hurt so it's understandable. Up until now, Ruby has been fairly invulnerable from Sam's point of view.

It's a good way to describe the feeling. A part of her wonders if the feeling has anything to do with so much of his blood being inside of her, but this is the first transfusion she's ever had so she doesn't have answers for that. Yogurt is a good option. Ironically, most of what she learned about nutrition she learned from him in his first life. To be fair, her insides took the brunt of the attack so she doesn't blame him for worrying about them. Once she'd been certain her body was going to stay alive, she started worrying about the possibility of permanent damage as well. "Faster than a human," she assures him. "I won't know if anything is permanently damaged until later though. Right now, I'm trying to focus all my power on healing, which means I'm going to sleep a lot the next few days." She doesn't want him to worry because she doesn't usually sleep much.

When he brings the food to the bed, she sits up a bit gingerly. He may have brought a bit of everything from the fridge, but it's a good thing because she's not usually snacky and she's got no idea what she wants to eat.

There is a strong possibility that his blood pumping inside of her connects them in a way that their demon connection used to. Ruby could share her observation later with another transfusion and Sam would make note of it. It definitely could be something they explore while she recovers. He absolutely could learn a thing or two now about (adult) nutrition from Ruby. It isn't the prime focus of his studies with what he intends to specialize in. The good thing he's noticed is that she hasn't crashed already and she isn't showing signs of slipping away. All signs point in favor of her body staying alive as long as the insides avoid infection. Permanent damage isn't something he can guess.

He forces a smile to his lips and nods. "Good. Uh, what I mean is you should rest. I'll be close by when wake up. Maybe I'll hang back from class. There isn’t exactly anything important this week." His eyes give away that he's already has a hard time with her bedridden and acting as normal.

He brought her everything as he had no idea either. He is only aware that his own taste buds swift to the weirdest things while sick too. He gives her a moment to see if she can pick out something first. "What about cheese? This kind almost melts on my tongue when I don't feel well." He holds up a cube to her lips.

She'll mention it at some point. Whether he wants to try and replicate the feeling with another transfusion is up to him. He'll need a couple of days to recover from the transfusion and by that time she shouldn't need one. She certainly won't let him give her a transfusion until he's recouped from this one. He'll, undoubtedly, learn a good deal about it in school at some point. She agrees that she's out of the woods now and in no danger of dying as long as the wound doesn't get infected or she doesn't tear something internally. There's little danger of that as long as she gets plenty of rest just as there is little danger of infection at this point as long as she keeps it clean. She knows it's not impossible to get an infection, but her demon blood treats all viruses and bacteria like intrusions that must be squashed. The infection would have to be stronger than the demon, and that seems unlikely unless it's specifically engineered to take down a demon. Unfortunately, it's not something she can guess at either. They'll have to wait for her to heal and see if everything works correctly.

Her brow furrows a little because his expression does belay what a difficult time he's having. "Come sit with me. We can watch a movie. It's almost a date." Except she probably will fall asleep on him halfway through the movie. "I won't lie; I'd like you to stay, but I don't want you to miss anything in school. If you need to go, and you feel like it, I'll be fine. I'll be right here when you get back."

She takes the cheese when offered and nods. "That is good. Brie?" she guesses at the kind of cheese then peruses the spread for a strawberry to go with it.

He'd have sit with his mixed feelings about her injury if she said nothing. "You sure you're up for that?" Partly he questions where she has any energy to focus to a movie before it sinks in that its for his sake. But he obeys her anyway. Sam slides closer to her and gathers her to him with as little jostling as possible. "All right then. I have the perfect one in mind." One they've watched together and were very familiar with. One that never stopped them from making out before and returning to without questioning what they missed. Ruby could doze off if she liked and Sam could watch her.

He shakes his head when he should have nodded. "I'll stay." Either way he can't live her yet.

He takes a closer look at the cheese and goes blank. "I– Yeah. It kind of looks like it. It's all that was left. Taste good?" If she would like to tease him with a description of the taste that would be a turn on. Strawberries are a good follow up choice. He's quiet to watch her pick up one of the berries and put it to her lips. Her eating was a good sign. He switches on the movie once he finds it with the controls.

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He drew stars around my scars

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